May 12, 2019

What Did I Do

When those blank eyes look up,
Reflecting the white sky,
I know that I should stop,
Even though I don't know why
His eyes become this wet.
Must be something I said.

Eyes welling up with tears
And when he gazes back
At the girl he hears.
The teardrop gets a knack
For escaping to tell
The secret hidden well.

And his eyelids turn pink,
Which provide a new link
As his heart goes to sink.

And the redenning nose.
And now that he's pink-faced,
As his deep sadness grows,
He closes his eyes, dazed
By his hurt, by this world,
By the words that he's told.

And the sides of his mouth
Go downward and down, down,
Wrinkling his face down south.
Please do not tell the town
What I've done to him now,
Though I don't really know.

I gaze in hopelessness
While he's shaking gently
To these very endless,
Uncontrollably queer,
Sweet rhythms of his problem.
They're mean, damn them, damn them.

But your blood's traitorious;
You have told everyone,
And they ran here, curious
About what I have done.
Soon, they tell the others,
For everyone bothers.

Now, the wise world is moved
By the sight of him here.
Every new task removed;
If planets could stop near.
But they do not know this,
What they did to cause this.

May 5, 2019


My mom doesn't like you,
But you are my warm sun,
For you banish my blues.
Right now, you are the one,
With your smile and your vibe;
You are part of my tribe.

I wish I can hold you
Here in my arms right now.
I wish nobody knew,
Lest they wouldn't know how
To keep us far apart,
Isolating my heart.

Please, do not forget me.
Maybe you'll help me see
Your pretty face, stay free.

For they lock me up here,
Watching all of the time.
I can sing if you're near.
Though love is not a crime,
We will love in secret
And keep all these private.

Apr 30, 2019

Day 30 Poem

I was wounded and down.
I was just so defeated.
You're on me like a hound
Smelling blood, excited,
Strengthened, and encouraged.
And all your wildness raged.

Well, I just couldn't think,
I just couldn't decide.
I haven't slept a wink.
Forgot wrong and right
Due to your brainwashing,
Breaking me in, breaking.

Couldn't do what I should.
If I could have, I would.
If you allowed, I could.

To tell you the raw truth
With unblinking boldness.
Punish your every tooth
For every ignorance.
To maintain my own place.
And your lies, I will face.

Day 29 Poem

You're Smaller Than I Thought
Someone else is weak and losing,
Someone else is crying those tears,
Someone else is lost and missing,
Someone else has disease of fears.

Someone else will kill for murder,
Someone else had run like crazy,
And they are depressed with bother
While I face it like it's not real.

Day 28 Poem

Change of Heart
All things down, three to go.
How long can I do it?
But here's to my ego,
Why did I do that sh*t?
What was it for, my dear,
If I am just so near?

I cried I won't finish.
I thought it was over.
I was ready to scream.
Not willing to cower.
Ready to get revenge
For something lost on edge.

Because of you, because
You're fighting for a cause
And you will give no pause.

But I got what I want.
And I still reached the end.
So I'll give what you want,
I will shut up and bend ...
Maybe I will return
Just so I can still burn.